Fandom: Doctor Who (2005)
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Eleventh Doctor/River Song, Eleventh Doctor/Jack Harkness/River Song
Characters: Jack Harkness, River Song, Eleventh Doctor
Additional Tags: Crack, Silly, Innuendo, Doctor Whump, I Can’t Believe I Wrote This, mature adult conversation but not explicit, Naughty, Crack Treated Seriously
It was deplorable, depraved and most importantly, dull. If only the latter could be said somewhat for his two companions who were getting on like tea and biscuits.
Why was it that his friends getting along always spelled trouble for him? So, of course, they managed to talk him into going there. He had no chance of winning against her enchanting green eyes, Jack’s baby blues and their pair of charming smiles. Why that place, he wasn’t certain; not that it mattered when River, whom the TARDIS unfairly favoured, could just take them there anyway.
Now as a consequence he found himself surrounded, or more accurately outnumbered, in a century of walking innuendo’s and come-on’s. Two of which sat with him, determined to make him blush, turning it into a contest.